One year ago, I realized that I could not sustain long hours of working. I blamed chemistry, my current major, for the most part. Not given prompt attention, the situation got worse. Right now I am horrified by the fact that only two of my ten hours spent in the library is productive. Lack of interest is clearly not a legitimate excuse. I have lost all self-discipline upon which all my past benefits were reaped. My life is procrastinated out. Knowing all the devastating consequences, I am yet unable to make a difference. Am I doomed to lose this battle against myself?    

Thank you for your comments, Xiangxiang. But, I think I am old enough to distinguish between the two. I am going on a novel fast for 30 days…I somehow have to regain my self-discipline and self-esteem.